Why I Focus On Strength & Health, and Stopped Fighting My Body: A Practice in Self-Love

The Body I Kept Fighting

Maybe I’m the only one who feels this way, but sometimes it seems like I’ve spent most of my life not being happy with my body. I’ve tried for years to shrink it, change it, fix it, and sometimes even punish it.

I have walked around the world admiring how other women look and dress, often comparing my own body to someone else’s, wishing I looked different.

…and as I write these words, I realize how strange they sound now that I have said them out loud.

Me? Fighting with the only body that I was ever given? What on earth is the point of that, and how could that way of viewing my body change anything at all?

This body has carried me through every chapter of my life. It has carried two precious babies, adapted to challenges, survived stress, healed from injuries, and shown up for me every single day—even during the years when I was criticizing it the most.

Getting Older is a Wake Up Call

When you get older, you really only have two options. You can either continue to fight and judge your body, or you can meet your body where it’s at, honor it, listen to it, and give it what it is asking for.

There is a reason that they call menopause the “change of life.” …because no matter what we do, there WILL BE changes!

Food that we used to love does not sit right with us anymore. Exercise we used to do does not give us the results we want anymore. …and we can struggle to find the energy to deal with any of it.

The Impossible Standard

It is not new that no matter how old we are, we are constantly bombarded with images of perfect bodies (not to mention perfect homes, perfect relationships, and perfect lives), and there is a whole industry of products and services that market to us by making us feel like we are falling short and perfection is possible, if only we bought…. ….whatever.

And now with AI, an even higher level of perfection can be manufactured in seconds! Photos can be enhanced. Faces and bodies can be altered. Reality can be edited until it barely resembles real life at all. …and as smart as we think we are, we so often fall for it.

These images and this messaging has been around, especially for women, since the beginning of time, and it is not going anywhere.

I declare that it is officially time to STOP comparing our very real bodies (and very real lives) to carefully curated—or completely AI generated—versions of reality!

What Can We Do?

I have come to realize that the “perfect” version of me isn’t the leanest, youngest, or most flawless version of myself. I am online and look at myself literally every day, and what I see is a very real person!

I have laugh lines, bad hair days, unfinished projects, moments of uncertainty. I am a work in progress, still learning, growing, and evolving, even at 57 years old.

I have come to realize that a happy and contented life cannot be found by constantly measuring myself against impossible standards. It can only be found in authenticity, connection, growth, and the courage to show up exactly as myself.

Can I still change how I look? Absolutely. I can build strength, both physically and emotionally, I can improve my fitness, and I can still feel more confident in my body than I have in years. …and most of this is about the glow that can come from within!

I have found so much FREEDOM and JOY from prioritizing fitness, nutrition and MYSELF as I age!

When you nourish your body, move regularly, prioritize sleep, manage stress, and show up for yourself consistently, something powerful happens. You begin to carry yourself differently. People notice it. They see the beauty, strength, and confidence that naturally comes from self-respect.

When physical pain is reduced, emotional burdens become lighter, energy increases, and everyday life becomes more enjoyable. You can travel, play, create, explore, and spend meaningful time with the people you love.

Movement feels like a gift instead of a punishment. Nutritious food feels like a warm hug to my stomach instead of restriction.

Because at the end of the day, this body isn’t standing in my way. It is the very thing carrying me through life.

What if the perfect version of you is simply the version that loves yourself enough to take care of yourself?

The truth is, perfection is always a moving target, and no one (and I mean no one) is perfect. No matter how close we think we get to perfection, there will always be another standard to meet, another flaw to fix, another reason to feel like we aren’t enough.

I do not care how many fitness and health influencers you are following. I promise that focusing on your health is NOT the yellow brick road to perfection! …BUT! It can be the road to FREEDOM. …the freedom to live life to the fullest, which I think is truly the definition of a good life.